This Night…Too…Will Pass

11:11 pm,

Or at least
That’s what I thought
The clock conveyed.

But the darkness of our bedroom,
And the ringing silence in my ears,
And the stony pain in my heart,

And the tears in my eyes…

Made it all,
A little too difficult
To tell
For sure.

Your leaving
Should have been easy,
Or so I thought.

We had too many challenges,
Too many mutually agreed differences,

I guess…

And we needed more space.

Easy to say.

So tonight,
I went to our bed,

Early,

Hoping for more rest,
More release,
More
Of whatever it took
To move beyond you…

Move beyond us.

But the darkness of this bedroom
Could not hide the hurt,

And the deadening silence
Only served to echo my failures,

My failures
To serve and love you,
To support and honor you,

To give you what you needed.

The only consolation,
Is that you’re not here
To see me weep,

Only the shadows
In our bedroom
Can mock me
For my weakness.

So,

Lying here
In the desolation
Of my emptiness
And emotional destitution,

All I can do,
Is hope and pray for sleep
To come.

All I can do
Is hope and pray
For release from my memories,

All I can do
Is hope and pray that
This night…

Too…

Will pass.

© 2018 W. C. Stacia, Jr.

16 thoughts on “This Night…Too…Will Pass

  1. Hiya, Bill. Sara here. I write, too, but am much more comfortable with abstractions. I really admire your courage to write strongly and simply about such big things. This poem really struck home with me because I’m about 2.5 years separated and I’ve been through those nights, too, mourning what’s been lost. Through counseling, I’ve realized my own mistakes. And also that, unfortunately, he is too lost in his pain and fear to be willing to change the way he interacts. I’ve grieved over that, too, because he could be a pretty incredible human being. As it is, he’s emotionally abusive.
    Maybe TMI (and if so, I’m sorry), but I wanted to let you know that your writing opened a little piece of brave in my heart and mind that I didn’t know I had yet. Thanks. 🙂
    I hope you find the peace you’re looking for. I’m a praying-type person, and if you don’t mind, I’ll pray for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Sara! Thank you so much for the very thoughtful comments and encouragement! I love to write and find it to be very cathartic. I admire writers who can capture the abstract, but I’ve never able to find a voice there. So, I guess I’m stuck in my current writing rut. If only it paid the bills!! 😊

      And I always appreciate prayers!!

      Thank you!!

      Like

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