Falling

I have been to that same cliff,
Looking into the chasm of my failures.

Embarrassment,
Frustration,
Fully faulted by my own

Ego…

Selfishness…

And unrelenting ineptitude.

All, categorically my own.

I’ve even believed…
Wrongfully,
And stupidly,
That I could simply remain
On the edge of that cliff.

As if I could observe,
But neither have to fully feel,
Nor accept the results of
My shortcomings.

But that self-lie is as egregious,
As the lies I’ve told others.

For in that moment of cliff-side reckoning,
The ripping of truth prevails
Even if not immediately…
And ultimately,
Pushes me from that cliff,

To the crystal clearness
Of all my faults
Laid out in a panoply of pain,
Below.

And in falling from that cliff,
To my certain,
And deserved reconciliation
With my true self…

I have failed, again.

Have you felt that falling feeling too?

Have you felt your heart in your throat,
As everything is pulled from beneath you?

Have you wanted to cry out in anguish,
And fear,
And complete help-less-ness?
So scared, though,
That the scream is stifled in your throat?

And neither knowing how you will survive
This time,
This fall,
Your hopelessness defines
Your certain destiny.

In all our failures…

Every time we approach that cliff,

And sure-to-follow fall,

I know this…

With abundant,
And complete clarity…

That you are there,
To catch me.

And…

I am there…

To catch you.

 

© 2017 W. C. Stacia, Jr.

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